June 16, 2021
By Tara Tiyaloglu
Staff Writer
This article is part of The Lighthouse’s five-part in-depth reporting series dedicated to the Class of 2021.
Applying to college can be a daunting endeavor, and it is especially nerve-wracking for those who do not have older relatives who have been through the process to help guide the way.
Senior Jessenia Lugo is among these students who must navigate all the firsts of college without drawing upon her parents’ experiences. In the fall, she will be studying nursing at Seton Hall University in South Orange, New Jersey.
“What inspired me was my parents. They sacrificed so much for me, and I believe I should make it up to them by at least accomplishing my goals,” Lugo said.
She said she made up her mind long ago that if she got the opportunity to go to college, she would take it.
She said she made up her mind long ago to take any opportunities that college has to offer. She said she knows many people who are not able to attend college, so she is extremely grateful.
Lugo said even though she will be the first in her family to go to college, she hopes she will not be the last.
“I have a little brother who’s currently in seventh grade, so once I graduate college or leave high school, I can tell him what it takes,” Lugo said.
Being the oldest cousin in her family, she said she wants to be influential to her younger family members and convey to them through her example that it is possible to reach the goals they set for themselves.
Guidance counselor Ms. Leidemer, who was also a first-generation college student, earned her bachelor’s degree from Felician College in Rutherford. She said she understands firsthand how stressful it can be to go through college without being able to rely on a family member’s experiences.
“I had to navigate the process on my own with some help from my school counselor and teachers,” Leidemer said. “My parents were not familiar at all with the college process, and English was their second language, so communicating with college admission counselors to get and give information often proved difficult,” Leidemer said.
She said she always knew college was her goal after high school, so that led her to develop a strong work ethic. Even though her parents had not gone to college, Leidemer said they believed it was important for her to earn a college degree because that would lead to new opportunities.
Leidemer said in her youth, she worried about not living up to her parents’ expectations.
“Another big worry was not knowing if I was on the right path, as I never allowed myself to think of what other options there might have been other than college,” Leidemer said.
Joana Kapaj, a 2019 LHS graduate, is also a first-generation college student. She just finished her sophomore year at Fairleigh Dickinson University in Florham Park.
“You have to be the one to get out there in the world that can seem so foreign [compared to] what you are used to and build those connections and pave the way for the future generations.”
Kapaj said confidence is key to a first-generation college student’s success.
“You can do whatever you set your mind to. I came to America not knowing a word of English, but now I am [at] an AACSB [Association to Advance Collegiate Schools of Business] international accredited university on a full-ride [scholarship to join] a fast-growing industry,” Kapaj said.
She said when Covid-19 shut down her campus last year, it prevented her from getting the full college experience she had anticipated. However, Kapaj said she seized the opportunities presented to her by attending as many virtual networking events as possible.
“You have to be the one to get out there in the world that can seem so foreign [compared to] what you are used to and build those connections and pave the way for the future generations,” Kapaj said.
She said she was determined to show her family and those back home in Albania that they can do it too.
“It’s a big feeling of accomplishment when you are able to do something for the first time in your family in a place thousands of miles away from home,” Kapaj said.
Stephen Carrie, who graduated from North Arlington High School in 2017, earned his bachelor’s degree from Rutgers University-New Brunswick. Carrie, who studied pre-law, said he had a hard time adjusting to college but was able to get through those tough times.
“I was super overwhelmed and didn’t know if I could make it through college, but with the support of my friends and family, I was able to accomplish actually graduating college,” Carrie said.
He said he felt a lot of pressure to succeed since he was a first-generation college student.
“My parents supported me throughout the whole way. Even though they never related to what I went through, I’m thankful they guided me in the right path,” Carrie said.
He said it is important for first students to persevere through the challenges they face.
“Cope with failure and learn from your mistakes,” Carrie said. “You’ll regret it if you never push yourself and set yourself up for success.’’
